We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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