do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
