God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
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all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
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He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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