We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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