Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
