Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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