Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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