Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
