Do you still have your period?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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