You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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