Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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