hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize