Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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