She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
