I was born with a shot glass in my hand
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
