the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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