You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
