her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize