I want to stick my p in your. b.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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