come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
