Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
