Don't you send me to vm
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
operation harelip BJ is a go
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
