She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
