I want to make a zoo with you.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
