you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Randomize
