are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
