Don't you send me to vm
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
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so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
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How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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