why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
