He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
