Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
