i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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