A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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