32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Randomize
