Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
