Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me