There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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