do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize