I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
True college students do jello shots in the library
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
