why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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