I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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