Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
