I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
