I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
