idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Princesses don't give blow jobs
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
