I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
