do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
