you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
My vagina just clenched in fear
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
