Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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