do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
