i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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